Elladan (lordelladan) wrote,
Elladan
lordelladan

The Observer: Do you feel terribly pleased when you've written one?
P. Larkin: Yes, as if I've laid an egg, and even more pleased when I see it published. Because I do think that's a part of it: you want it to be seen and read, you're trying to preserve something. Not for yourself, but for the people who haven't seen it or heard it or experienced it.

Elladan always was more of a mere puppet to me. As corny as it is, I put thought into him and his entries, as retarded, idiotic, and subpar as all of them are, and I became extremely attached to him - he even became a reflection of my current state of mind.

But I suppose that is all over and he's become some sort of dying horse that needs to be shot and put out of its patheticness.

So, Elladan is bowing out. Go on, Elladan, bow.

[Elladan bows.]

Elladan: It's been nice existing with you all, and I figure I should go and live peacefully with my wife in the sunset or some shit like that - burrowed happily and nestled like spoons in Audrey's head. Because I do deserve some happiness after all she's put me through. I adore you all. Bye bye, everyone.

So there you have it.

*puts on recording of Sid Vicious's cover of 'My Way'*

[Elladan, Tindomiel, and Audrey hold hands and sing]:
And now, the end is near;
And so I face the final curtain.
My friend, I'll say it clear,
I'll state my case, of which I'm certain.

I've lived a life that's full.
I've traveled each and ev'ry highway;
But more, much more than this,
I did it my way.

Regrets, I've had a few;
But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption.

I planned each charted course;
Each careful step along the byway,
But more, much more than this,
I did it my way!!!!!

[Audrey takes out a pistol and picks off the people in the audience.]

Audrey: WOO HA! GOOD NIGHT EVERYONE!!!!
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